27 April 2012

Geographical Bias (Happy Friday!)

Deb sent me this today. I think only happily Facebookfree people like myself haven't seen it yet. We tried to find an original source, but were unable to. I've been looking at it, trying to figure out which province the creator lives in. I'm going with BC, because this seems like the kind of thing those Lulu-lovin', riot-sex-havin' tea-snobs would create. I mean, there are FOUR Atlantic provinces and they couldn't think of anything more descriptive to say about them than "talk funny"? Total Westcoast.   

This tracks surprisingly well with an assessment another Westerner, who ironically, but-not-completely-ironically, refers to herself as 'seriously Westcoast, recently gave me of The Rest of Canada:
The North: big, lots of fishes and trees. 
Saskatchewan, Manitoba, "western Ontario": MB and SK are interchangeable empty wastelands. Western Ontario may be entirely imaginary (e.g. "Thunder Bay" is clearly a made-up place).
Ontario: all municipalities and locations within it are within a one-hour drive of Toronto, except for Toronto's suburbs, which are a 3-hour commute from downtown. 
The East: not sure of the difference between Nova Scotia and New Brunswick. Also, can't remember whether Labrador is the island one, or Newfoundland. PEI is a place where time stands still, as enforced by the provincial government in 1908. Also, mandatory braided pigtails for all elementary school children (note the gender-neutral policy). Proportion of individuals with extensive freckles and ginger hair is rising due to strict immigration and marriage requirements.
She is an eternal fount of stupid opinions borne of a conceited sense of superiority, infuriatingly coupled to false modesty and humility. 

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