17 April 2011

This year, I'm voting Natural Law

My new favourite pasttime is looking at the previous election results in my friends' ridings and telling them whom to vote for. I don't know, you tell me, is that annoying?

Ultimately I'm happy as long as people vote, and doubly happy if they vote smartly or strategically. Less happy if they vote for a party I don't necessarily support, but at least they're voting, which is more than we can say for almost half of our country. (Aside to all my immigrant friends on their way to becoming Canadian: hurry it up. The rational parties need your votes).

I was looking at the history in my riding, which has a Liberal incumbent. This year's ballot is the standard 4 parties. In 2006 there was a Marxist option, and 56 people voted for that. Alej - here's your riding. You get a Marxist option, lucky girl.
In my riding, there have been two parties I've never heard of: "Christian Heritage" and "Natural Law."
I mean, the first is probably what you'd expect, based on the name. The second? My first thought was some kind of platform based on some bastardisation of the law of natural selection. But that would really only get you the alpha male, asshole vote, so what is it really, I wonder? Some proto-Green party? Well, no. According to Wikipedia, it's "the Canadia branch of the international Natural Law Party founded in 1992 by a group of educators, business leaders, and lawyers who practiced Trancendental Meditation." Lulu Lemon pants in every pot! Apparently some dude ran for President for this party fairly recently. Sometimes I feel so out of touch.

The Natural Law platform sounds very L.Ron Hubbard-y:
  • Establish a team of 1,000 yogic flyers. According to the party, such a group "dissolves collective stress, as indicated by significant reductions in crime, unemployment, sickness, and accidents, and improved economic indicators and quality of life". They would also would provide an "invincible defence".  [Huh?]
  • Introduce daily Transcendental Meditation for all school students [Yeah, right after O Canada and the moment of silence]
  • Lower taxes, as yogic flyers will supposedly increase prosperity, allowing the government to collect the same amount of money with a lower tax rate [Lol, "we'll make you richer but take the same proportion of your income, thus taking more of your money."] 
  • Ban genetic engineering, and encourage organic farming [25% of their platform is okay, apparently]
In 1997, 156 Dartmouthers thought this was a good idea.

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