I'm far too exhausted today to write a proper rant about this. I know the world was a different place in the 1950s, when a two brothers could think of no better way to dispose of their excess octopus than throwing it at hockey players. Since then, however, we've kind of run out of marine life and I don't think chucking it onto ice rinks is really putting what's left of our aquatic resources to good use. Do you? I mean, I get annoyed when people use marine life for sustenance, imagine how frustrated this makes me.
Granted, I don't know the population status of any octopi, but I'd prefer fans throw something we know we have plenty of, like.....spiders. Spiders have 8 legs and are probably less smelly to carry around. Or, hey, what about something with, I don't know, red wings? Redwinged blackbirds seem pretty ubiquitous, throw them around for a change.
So, you know what team I'll be rooting for in the alternate universe where I'm interested in hockey. It'll be whichever team doesn't throw marine life onto the ice. Should a case arise where competing teams throw terrestrial animals, I'd probably cheer for the team throwing the least cute animal.
1 comment:
your writing reminds me of Dave Eggers, and it just pulled me out of a mental rut.
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