16 November 2010

Other people's expressions of themselves

Earlier this year, right after I got my car, I saw a curious bumper sticker. It looked home made and said:

"I like my men. Cold. Dead. Sparkly."

I didn't know what to make of it. The asinine grammar aside, it didn't make any sense. I assumed the person who made it (presumably a female person) left out a key phrase, such as "like I like my diamonds" or something. This bumper sticker puzzled me for a long time, and it took Oz to point out to me that it was a Twilight reference, because in the stupid Twilight universe vampires are all sparkly. Whatever, "Stephenie" Meyer - your names have too many e's and your books are stupid.

I find it kind of sad that someone who has their life together enough to own a car would also like Twilight enough to display it for the world. And what if she made the sticker herself? Is that sadder than her having spent money on it? Has no one introduced this poor, lost soul to Buffy? Buffy who has much more realistic expectations when it comes to men:
"I like my evil like I like my men. Evil! You know, straight up black-hat-tie-you-to-the-train-tracks-soon-my-electro-ray-will-destroy- Metropolis bad."

Yesterday driving around I saw a vanity plate that read: 
Before I sounded it out I read it as Born 2XL, as in the person was born plus-sized, and was damn proud of it. And I was thinking, "Odd...but okay. Good for you for embracing who you are." Then I realized it's more likely the actual message of the plate is "born to excel" to which my reaction was, "Idiot, you clearly don't excel at picking vanity plates."

Now I'm going to take this opportunity to randomly post one of my favourite pictures of Spike and Giles.

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